UNSTOPPABLE: LIVING OUR BEST LIVES FOR GOD
Declan and Ruby love an adventure. In 30+ years of marriage, they lived in three countries, and traveled to over 80 cities.
They became Christians in college, always active in lay ministry and short-term missions. In 2003, they moved to East Asia, a tentmaking family with three young boys, one modest salary, and many unknowns.
What gave them the courage to do so? Simply this: “We made a decision to give our all to God.”
“But the sacrifice keeps crawling off the altar,” Ruby said, “changing our minds when the fire gets hot. Time and again, we somehow leaned into His grace and crawled back up again. The decision has to be made each time the fire gets hot.”
The fire got hot when Declan had to change jobs several times in the early years. Or when the kids struggled in local school. International schools were not an option at the time. How did they weather the heat?
“The best decision we made before getting on the field was to build a prayer team,” Ruby explained. “The biggest secret to our longevity… Those who remain in isolation usually fall off the racetrack. We were blessed to have a lot of help and wise counsel.”
Going overseas was not just a personal decision. They were confirmed and sent, as Paul and Barnabas were, from the Body of Christ and with prayer.
Over time, Declan and Ruby became deacons of a local church, serving as they did in America. They led worship and trained worship leaders. They hosted a couples’ fellowship, where the husbands finally came because they saw the change in their families. Declan lived his dream of marketplace discipleship, mentoring others at work, and helping young entrepreneurs. Ruby had given up her engineering career for family, but God gave her a platform as author, speaker and thought leader on marriage, family, and education in East Asia.
Declan and Ruby never pretended to be the perfect couple. Their brutal honesty about personal trials in marriage, family, and parenting gave credence to their message anywhere: from their fellowship to national TV, radio, and internet media.
Strong-minded and competitive, Ruby confessed, “Marriage is the toughest of all because it's hard to forget that your partner is not the enemy. I aspired to be a martyr but…God (wanted) me to express it at home in dying to self. I wanted a fast, heroic, and glorious death, but He wanted a slow roast in a long furnace called marriage.”
What preserved the marriage is their devotion and joint commitment to live their best lives for God, no matter what.
They have had high highs and low lows. But they always return to a place of submission to God and to one another. Mission is possible because of their life with God and commitment to each other.
Back in the US and empty nested, Declan and Ruby sold their house to pursue a minimalist lifestyle and the freedom to hit the road again for Great Commission impact. They cheer and challenge their adult sons by staying in close touch with them and entrusting their faith journeys to God.
Reflection Questions:
If you had at some point made a decision to give your all to God, how has that decision been challenged and reconfirmed in your walk with God?
Having a dedicated prayer team contributes to longevity and fruitfulness of service. Do you have a supportive faith community and/or close friends you could invite to become your prayer team if you should serve overseas?
If you are married, your life with God and commitment to one another will anchor you through the trials and tempests of life here and on the field. How are you doing as partners on this faith journey of life and service?